The head of Greenock Fire Brigade, The Right Reverend Malley O’Alley, was dismayed to hear about a car smashing through a wall and onto an embankment all because of a driver’s fear of bees.
“I understand melissophobia can affect us all, apart from people who aren’t complete fucking morons, I mean, seriously, the guy was inside a car and the bee was outside and… for fuck’s sake.”
The driver, Ruby MacGoo, 23, had just returned from getting her moustache waxed by a guy called Derek when she spotted the bee on the wall and smashed her car into it at full pelt in order to “rid the world of one more of those wee fuckers”.
Police say she was let off with a caution for “smashing up bricks that urnae hers”. She was let off with the heaver offence of “killing a bee” when an autopsy revealed the victim it was a fly wearing a jumper.
Eleven people were killed in the accident; four of them seriously