Magazine Ranting

The Sweet Smell of Success

By Dick Beavers, Seat Wetter

Back when I was a cub reporter I worked for a very obnoxious editor. He would throw the toys out of the pram at every opportunity, shout and ball at everyone and generally just be a prick.

One day, I’d decided enough was enough and wanted revenge. And I got it.

I generally worked later than he did and I concocted a plan. Each night I would pee into a small cup then sprinkle it onto his office chair before I left the building. Each day he would sit in the damp patch then wander around the office wondering why he was reeking of piss.

He was the laughing stock of the office and no-one took his ranting seriously anymore.

He never worked it out, but the moral of the story if there is one? Don’t fuck with Dick.

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